questions to ask before giving up & the butterfly project
- lxrynwxtring
- Sep 27, 2022
- 4 min read
9/27/22
hello cherubs! as our last segment of suicide prevention month, we are going to be going through some questions to ask ourselves before giving up and talk about the butterfly project.
both of these are two very important ways to reduce self-harm and suicide rates and I believe that they can be beneficial to anyone...
as humans, I believe that we all beat ourselves up from time to time. some of us are really good at giving ourselves grace and kindness, but for some of us it doesn't come as naturally.
learning to be kind to our minds and show ourselves that we deserve to live a happy, fulfilling life, we must understand that we deserve to be here.
sometimes, life can be consuming and it can be extremely hard to find the will to continue on, so I found a list of questions to ask ourselves before giving up. these question can often leave us motivated to find a reason to continue living.
this list was found on Pinterest, from this link: https://www.popsugar.com/smart-living/Self-Care-Printable-39297908
questions to ask before giving up:
are you hydrated?
if not, have a glass of water.
have you eaten in the past three hours?
if not, get some food--something with protein, not just simple carbs. perhaps some nuts or hummus?
have you showered in the past day?
if not, take a shower right now
have you stretched your legs in the past day?
if not, do so right now. if you don't have the energy for a run or trip to the gym, just walk around the block, then keep walking as long as you please. if the weather's crap, drive to big box store and go on a brisk walk through the aisles you normally skip.
have you said something nice to someone in the past day?
do so, whether online or in person. make it genuine; wait until you see something really wonderful about someone, and tell them about it
have you moved your body to music in the past day?
if not, jog for the length of an EDM song at your favorite tempo, or just dance around the room for the length of an upbeat song
have you cuddled a living being in the past two days?
if not, do so. don't be afraid to ask for hugs from friends of friends' pets. most of them will enjoy the cuddles too; you're not imposing on them
have you seen a therapist in the past few days?
if not, hang on until your next therapy visit and talk through things then
have you changed any of your medications in the past couple weeks, including skipped doses or a change in generic prescription brand?
that may be screwing with your head. give things a few days, then talk to your doctor if it doesn't settle down
if daytime: are you dressed?
if not, put on clean clothes that aren't pajamas. give yourself permission to wear something special, whether it's a funny t-shirt or pretty dress
if nighttime: are you sleepy and fatigued but resisting going to sleep?
put on pajamas, make yourself cozy in ned with a teddy bear and the sound of falling rain, and close your eyes for fifteen minutes--no electronic screens allowed. if you're still awake after that, you can get up again; no pressure
do you feel ineffective?
pause right now and get something small completed, whether it's responding to an email, loading up the dishwasher, or packing your gym bag for your next trip. good job!
do you feel unattractive?
take a selfie. your friends will remind you how great you look and you'll help fight society's restriction on what beauty can look like
do you feel paralyzed by indecision?
give yourself ten minutes to sit back and figure out a game plan for the day. if a particular decision or problem is still being a roadblock, simply set it aside for now, and pick something else that seems doable. right now, the important part is to break through that stasis, even if it means doing something trivial
have you over-exerted yourself lately-- physically, emotionally, socially or intellectually?
that can take a toll that lingers for days. give yourself a break in that area, whether it's physical rest, taking time alone, or relaxing with some silly entertainment
have you waited a week?
sometimes our perception of life is skewed, and we can't even tell that we're not thinking clearly, and there's no obvious external cause. it happens. keep yourself going for a full week, whatever it takes, and see if you still feel the same way then
the best thing you can do when you have thought of suicide is to not make any immediate decisions. I do not believe that suicide is always the answer. but when you have no way of getting help, it is the last symptom of depression.
but there are more ways to get help than you think, you just have to be willing to reach out.
the next thing I want to discuss is this really neat project called the Butterfly Project. I am not sure the exact creator of this project but I found it super interesting and wanted to share.
the rules are:
when you feel like you want to self-harm, take a marker and draw a butterfly on your arm or hand
name the butterfly after a loved one, or someone that really wants you to get better
you must let the butterfly fade naturally. no scrubbing it off
if you self-harm before the butterfly is gone, you've killed it. if you don't self-harm, it lives
if you have more than one butterfly, self-harm kills them all
another person may draw them on you. these butterflies are extra special and you must take care of them
even if you don't self-harm, you can still draw a butterfly anyways to show your support. if you do this, name it after someone you know that self-harms or is suffering and tell the it could help
this may seem like a silly idea, but for that moment when you want to self-harm, this can be used as a distraction.
you can use other drawings, it doesn't have to be a butterfly, but drawing rather than harming yourself is a much better alternative.
I hope that these extra little blogs were helpful to someone this month. not only this month, but every month, it is important to keep an eye out for those struggling.
always do your best to check in on people and reach out when you yourself are struggling. there are people out there that care about you, you just have to find them.
remember, you deserve to be here.
xx Loryn
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